Something for Everyone

It’s pretty awesome that in a world full of varied dietary restrictions, allergies, and preferences, there really is something for everyone. Back in the day, when I decided to opt out of meat & dairy, I was really blown away by all the options that I still had access to (some better than others, to be honest, but still).

Because people in my life have been gracious and thoughtful in regard to my food preferences, I try and be thoughtful about dishes I prepare. I want to make sure most people will be able to enjoy themselves, food-wise. This can get difficult when everyone’s guidelines get thrown into the mix. “Well, Malcolm is gluten-free, Shirley only eats organic, Tasha is vegan, Kendall prefers local food, Brenica is lactose intolerant, and Jerry doesn’t eat any food with more than five letters.”

I’m happy to report that one of my absolute favorite snacks in the world is pretty flexible for most food values. You can opt for organic or local versions of the ingredients; it’s vegan, vegetarian & gluten-free; if you are cutting down on carbs (lord help you) you’re golden; if you have a peanut allergy…um…skip the steps involving peanut butter and you’ll be fine, I think.

PEANUT BUTTER AND JELLY SPOON

Ingredients:

• 1 spoonful of peanut butter
• 1 spoonful of jelly
• Parsley for garnish (optional, but classy)

Directions:

1) Procure peanut butter & jelly that fit with your dietary preferences

2) Dip your spoon in the peanut butter

3) Dip your spoon in the jelly

4) Enjoy!

Chopped Challenge

Food Network is slowly taking over the world. Or, at least, our Hulu channel at home. What will the dueling chefs do with their secret ingredient of…SEAWEED? Will that chef finally listen to the judges and get a bandanna so he quits sweating all over his fancy risotto? Is that super tall cake shaped like Sponge Bob going to fall over and more importantly, will that lady with the downturned mouth even dain to look at it?

My current favorite is Chopped, where competing chefs receive a mystery basket with various ingredients and need to prepare a dish for judges to…judge. The main thing I’ve gleaned from the show so far is to be wary of using the ice cream maker for your dessert, and that if the judges are watching you from behind their fingers, you’ve probably burned something.

Even though I don’t have a basket with a top, I always imagine being on the show (although with my luck, that episode the basket would be full of artisianal hand soaps or something). Nonetheless, I wanted to create my own Chopped challenge. I went into my kitchen, picked 4 ingredients at random, and just went for it.

CHOPPED, GASTRO-A-GO-GO-STYLE

Ingredients:

• 4-5 rando ingredients (probably better if someone picks them out for you, but do what you can)
• Parsley for garnish (optional, but classy)

Directions:

1) Take in the ingredients in front of you – bonus points if you look at them wide-eyed, maybe chewing your lip contemplatively

2) Start taking apart ingredients, trying out a little taste here and there to figure out flavor profiles

3) However you decide to prepare the ingredients, you need to run around and yell “Behind you!” (even if you are by yourself – it helps up the ante)

4) Make sure your hands are shaking as you arrange stuff on the plate – you won’t look legit if you don’t have a little shake going on

5) One of your ingredients should be used as a flourish – which usually means scraped against the plate in a semi-purposeful fashion

6) Enjoy! Your dish will vary depending on the ingredients, but for this example I came up with: Orange Slices with a Cauliflower Floret Accompaniment, followed by a Trail Mix Chaser and Don’t Do Anything With That Relish It’s Just Decoration

What say you, Ted Allen?

Sensory Celebration

It is amazing what memories and feelings come up from just one scent or sound or taste. The smell of fresh cut grass = summer memories. A sip of boxed wine = first official hangover memories. A waft of pipe tobacco being smoked = loved grandparent memories. The first strains of that song you listened to on repeat after the break-up = ugly crying memories (or maybe currently happening don’t worry about it I’m fine).

Well, get your senses ready, friends, because it’s time to celebrate America, America-style. A lot of people are getting ready to fire up grills and slap on suntan lotion and set off firecrackers so close to your house it’s almost horrible but it’s not because freedom. I’m extra lucky, because my 4th’o’July celebration extends three extra days – three of my favorite people have birthdays lined up right in a row following the fireworks.

I have so many sights/smells/tastes wrapped up in my memories of celebrating the 4th of July w/a 3 birthday bonus. In addition to the typical traditional tastes of grilled meats and corn on the cob, is carrot cake. This dessert is a favorite of the July 5th birthday girl, my amazing mother. Here’s a sneak peek at a carrot cake recipe I’ve prepped in the past that just might find it’s way into the birthday celebration this year – bonus: it’s 70% organic!

CARROT CAKE LUNA BAR

Ingredients:

• 1 Carrot Cake LUNA bar
• Parsley for garnish (optional, but classy)

Directions:

1) Obtain LUNA bar with proper amounts of organic ingredients

2) Open the wrapper

3) Take the bar out of the wrapper

4) Place a celebratory candle up on there, and enjoy!

Say Cheese (if you please)

Some of us are lucky and find people in our lives who we just connect with. People who understand us better than we understand ourselves. People who make us laugh so hard it counts as a core workout. People who you love unconditionally, and they return the favor without question.

I’m lucky that I’m related to two such people. My sisters are two of the funniest, sweetest, most inspiring people I know. Plus, they have a lot of dirt on me, so it’s good to have them as allies.

One of my sisters is getting married this week to a pretty fantastic gent, and I wanted to do a recipe in her honor. It’s odd how you can grow up together, and still develop totally different tastes. I’ve never been much for cheese, and yet my sister is all about it (in terms of food, not romance).

I wasn’t really sure what to do to create a cheese-centered dish. Doesn’t the cheese just stand alone? I put this recipe together based on a couple of her fave staples, and hope other cheese lovers enjoy what I’m entitling Cheese Delight.

CHEESE DELIGHT

Ingredients:

• Handful or two of Cheeze-Its
• 1/2 cup to 1 cup cottage cheese
• 1-2 string cheese…chunks (?)
• Parsley for garnish (optional, but classy)

Directions:

1) Procure ingredients

2) Arrange ingredients on plate or in bowl

3) Devise your favorite way to enjoy, combo-style (for example, I think you can dip the Cheeze-Its IN the cottage cheese…maybe crumble on top? I don’t know the cheese rules, here)

Tofu-licious

I haven’t had meat in quite some time (5 years or so?). When I was younger I was a vegetarian for a while, but it was mostly to tell people haughtily that I was a vegetarian. This is around the same time that I was wearing black lipstick and playing French horn in honor band, so there was just a lot going on back then.

When I decided to cut out meat this time around, I was a bit more informed and a bit less angsty about it. I remember being pleasantly surprised the first time I tried tofu when I went out to eat. Crumble it on salad! Fry it into crispy strips sprinkled with salt and black pepper! Stir fry it up with delish sauce and enjoy as it soaks up the flavor in a dreamy way! Tofu is awesome and versatile.

My number one go-to recipe for tofu is as a Sriracha Vehicle, as sriracha the best.

SRIRACHA VEHICLE TOFU

Ingredients:

• 1 block of tofu
• Sriracha
• Parsley for garnish (optional, but classy)

Directions:

1) Open the tofu (probably over the sink, to be safe)

2) You are supposed to press the water out of the tofu – I opt to squish it around in my hands

3) Crumble the tofu in a bowl

4) Pour A LOT of sriracha all up on there

5) Enjoy!

Tropical Travels

Officially in vacation mode, and life is pretty grand.

To be technical, in honeymoon mode. Although we got hitched last year, we waited a bit for our honeymoon and it was totally worth it.

When you’re traveling, there are so many new sensations to take in (especially if you’ve been hibernating all winter and all of a sudden there is an ocean and sunlight and you discover you have a neck because your shoulders aren’t stuck up by your ears from tension derived from driving on sheer ice for 4 months).

It’s good to get out of your comfort zone every once in a while, food choices included. I was a little nervous about transitioning to a tropical flavor profile, and how my tastebuds would adjust in a new climate. I started training for this experience over the last few months, and am happy to report that so far I have adjusted seamlessly to island fare.

The decadent, exotic flavors of a Chocolate Dipped Coconut LUNA bar really allowed me to prepare fully for this trip, and I wanted to share this lush recipe with you if you find yourself needing to prep for future island travels.

CHOCOLATE DIPPED COCONUT LUNA BAR

Ingredients:

• 1 Chocolate Dipped Coconut LUNA bar
• Parsley for garnish (optional, but classy)

Directions:

1) Look at the bar and decide if you want to eat it

2) If the answer is “yes,” use your fingers to open the wrapper

3) Take the bar out of the wrapper (if you are somewhere warm, be sure to check for chocolate that may have melted inside the wrapper – THIS IS YOURS FOR THE TAKING)

4) Eat the bar

Vino Variations

A lot of focus in this blog has been on food. And food is the fuel that keeps us going, to be sure. But our bodies are mostly made up of water. I mean, just look at this guy:

Taking this one step further – how much better would it be if most of our bodies were made up of wine? The logical trail here may not be rock solid, but the conclusion sure is: wine is delicious.

Having had my fair share of all varieties of vino, I wanted to find a new twist on this tried and true recipe. But how to perfect something already so perfect? Glancing through my kitchen cupboards helped me find the solution I was looking for.

Veering off the beaten path of wine glasses, I went out on a limb and enjoyed this adult beverage in a mason jar. This was an excellent decision for three equally important reasons:

1) I felt adventuresome

2) I’m pretty sure hip people use mason jars, so my coolness quota may have just gone up

3) I didn’t have to do dishes, which currently include all my wine glasses from beverages past

WINE

Ingredients:

• 1 bottle of wine, any variety
• Wine opener (depending on selected wine)
• Parsley for garnish (optional, but classy)

Directions:

1) Find a bottle of wine that has at least 3/4 of the wine still in the bottle

2) Open bottle. If bottle needs to be uncorked, you may need a wine opener (when it looks like the opener has landed like a triumphant gymnast, you are good to go)

3) Pour wine into mason jar

 

4) Repeat as necessary

More Like “Quick-peas”

Steering clear of meat (inadvertent pun, I promise) isn’t as difficult as one might think. Initially it took some adjustment to rethink how to get protein on the plate, but I now feel pretty good about the options I have in my repertoire. One little bean that packs a big protein punch is the lovely chickpea.

The first time I went to the store in search of these little guys, I couldn’t find chickpeas anywhere. I went home empty-handed, thinking I would need to find a specialty store (“Chickpeas’R’Us,” or the like). THEN I found out chickpeas are also called garbanzo beans, and they are totally a part of your basic grocery store bean shelf party. The more you know.

My favorite way to enjoy these tasty garbanzos is to roast them up, so they are slightly crunchy and mucho delicioso. Here are the typical steps I follow to make Roasted Chickpeas.

ROASTED CHICKPEAS

Ingredients:

• 1 can of chickpeas/garbanzo beans (remember, these are the same thing)
• 2-4 tbsp of olive oil
• Salt
• Pepper
• Cayenne pepper (optional)
• Parsley for garnish (optional, but classy)

Directions:

1) Preheat oven to 425

2) Open the can of chickpeas

3) Drain  & rinse the chickpeas (someone told me to do this once, so I’m telling you, too)

4) Spread out the chickpeas on a cookie sheet.

5) Realize you have no olive oil left which is crucial to the recipe and your partner has the car and you are really really hungry and why was the bottle placed back in the cupboard when there wasn’t any left?

6) Give up on the roasting idea, turn off the oven, and slide chickpeas off cookie sheet into a bowl

7) Sprinkle some salt and maybe cayenne pepper on there, and give yourself credit for attempting to use your oven for something other than storage